One Month

As of today, I've been married for one month.  And can I tell you it's not what I thought it would be.

Don't think things have gone poorly, I'm loving married life!  It's just...so different from what I expected, even after such a short time.  Here are some things I've noticed:

1.  Being married is hard! (Duh, Sarah.) I know, I know, I've been hearing this since I got engaged, and I knew that being married would be hard - very hard.  But, somehow I expected it to take a little while to settle in.  I thought we'd have to wear at each other for some time before the difficulties began, but it was like as soon as we said "I do," someone cranked up the knob on the work we would have to put into our relationship.  I find it easier to get upset over small things and catch myself being selfish more often.

2.  Being married is not like dating.  I think I had this expectation that things would be similar to how they were while Mat and I were dating, but that I'd get to stay at his house at the end of the night.  It is so not like that!  It's less about dating and wooing the other person, and more about figuring out how to live life, together.  How do we maintain our house?  How do we get work done for school?  What will our days look like?

3. Being married is not about me.  I was told this quite a bit before getting married, and I knew it.  But I can tell already, I'm not always going to be happy.  I'm not always going to get what I want.  It's about making choices that please God and are best for both of us.  It's about being loving towards my husband, even if that means doing what I don't want to do.  I want to start those habits now.

4. I love Mat. Well, obviously I do.  And it didn't take being married to realize that.  But it makes me smile to think about how much I really do love him.  Even when he goes a little to far in making fun of me and makes me cry.  Even when he can't for the life of him decide what coffee maker he wants.  Even when he doesn't talk to me for an entire car ride.  I'm crazy about that man, and I want him by my side forever.